Talk Your Child Clever

Writen by Susan du Plessis

Most parents can hardly wait for their baby to say its first word. This usually happens between the nine months and a year. From about two years, the child should be able to use simple phrases, and by three he should be able to use full sentences. By four, he should be fully able to talk, although he may still make grammatical errors. By five, he should have acquired basic language.

There is little doubt that language acquisition is one of the key milestones in early childhood development. Much of a child's future social and intellectual development hinges on this milestone. A language delay can lead to isolation and withdrawal, and to learning difficulties and poor academic performance. Recent research has revealed a dramatic link between the development of spoken language and written language among children, and the importance of language acquisition to basic reading skills.

Many parents believe that the term "language development" implies that the child's acquisition of language is an automatic process. This, however, is not the case. There is nothing that any human being knows or can do that he has not learned. This is especially true of language acquisition.

The child begins to learn language from the day he is born. From the very first moment it is the parents' responsibility to lay a proper foundation that will enable the child to acquire adequate language skills. Just like parents must ensure that a child follows a healthy and balanced diet for optimal physically development, they must take steps to ensure optimal language development.

HOW LANGUAGE IS ACQUIRED

Parents should start talking to their little baby from the day he is born. Some mothers are by nature quiet and reserved. Others have the unfortunate idea that it is foolish to talk to their babies, knowing that they do not understand. The mother, who does not talk continually while feeding, bathing and dressing her baby, is laying the foundation for a late talker.

The baby learns language in one way only, and that is by hearing language as the parents talk and talk to it. The more a parent can talk to a child, often repeating the same words, the same phrases, the same structures over and over, the sooner the child will learn language.

An important thing to note here is that by the time a baby is about nine months old he should be able to understand simple words and commands. He may perhaps also be able to say a few simple words already. Invariably, however, one finds that the baby understands much more than he is able to say. In fact, this remains so of any person throughout his life. One is always able to understand more of any language, even one's mother tongue, than one is able to use in active speech. This is even more so of any second or third languages that a person is able to speak.

This shows that we have two more or less separate masses of language knowledge, our PASSIVE knowledge (also called receptive language) on one hand, and our ACTIVE (expressive language) on the other. When we listen or read, we make use of our passive vocabulary, and when we speak or write, of our active vocabulary.

An important thing to note here is that the child's passive vocabulary came into being through constant and continual repetition of words, phrases or structures. Once a word, phrase or structure has been repeated often enough, it also becomes part of the baby's active vocabulary. This shows that the active vocabulary can only be improved VIA the passive. Research has shown that a child who is just beginning to talk must hear a word about 500 times before it will become part of his active vocabulary. Long before that it will already form part of his passive vocabulary. This means that parents should create as many opportunities as possible in which their baby can hear them talk.

THE SECRET OF READING TO YOUR CHILD

Parents should read to their children as often as possible. The secret, however, which will lead to optimal language development, is to read the SAME stories over and over and over.

In the "good old days" there was not the abundance of storybooks that there is today. Parents were compelled - it was also part of the child-rearing traditions - to tell over and over to their children the few stories that they knew, or to read over and over to their children the few books in their possession. They also spent a lot of time teaching their children rhymes and songs. As I discovered for myself through my own son, this over and over repetition of the same stories and rhymes was extremely beneficial for the acquisition of language. In fact, I took this tradition to the extreme, exposing my son to only ONE book for nearly two years.

Soon after my elder son, Gustav, was born, I bought him a book with the story of Pinocchio. The book was aimed at four-year-olds. Except for talking to him continually, I started to read to him from this book when he was only two or three months old - as often as I could, over and over and over. I found this tedious, of course. Gustav, however, loved it, and the results of this experiment made all my efforts worthwhile. Not only did he start talking much sooner than most children do, but when he was just over two years, he could recite nearly all the pages from Pinocchio. When turning to a new page, one only had to read the first word or two on that page and he would recite the rest of the page like a parrot. In itself this may seem quite useless, but of great importance was that the vocabulary in this book soon became part of his everyday speech. In terms of language development, he was soon miles ahead of his age group. In fact, to this day, his vocabulary and his ability to speak with clarity are quite astounding.

When a child is a bit older, one should start teaching him nursery rhymes. Research has shown that knowledge of nursery rhymes among three-year-olds was a significant predictor of later prereading skills even after the children's IQ and their mothers' educational levels were partialed out.

While an apple a day keeps the doctor away, talking forever makes your child clever!

About The Author

Susan du Plessis (BD; BA Hons) is an author of five books on learing and learning disabilities.

Website: http://www.audiblox2000.com

Email: susandup@audiblox2000.com

Beyond The Words A Childs Voice

Writen by Patricia Gatto

Voices have a way of falling into a pattern, not unlike the sound of constant rain. At first, the rain is obvious as it dramatically announces its arrival, and for a brief moment, you acknowledge the intrusion. But slowly, the rhythmic sounds fade into the background, becoming nothing more than a distant drone.

We are fortunate to have the ability to block out sounds like the pouring rain; otherwise, it would be impossible for us to concentrate. But what happens when the rain is actually the voice of a child, and you are so focused on your own thoughts that you forget to hear?

Even the most dedicated parent or caregiver can fail to hear the understated nuances of a child's plea. It's impossible to play detective and uncover the meaning behind every word and every gesture. Sometimes a whine is simply a whine. But if your busy schedule has you constantly preoccupied, you may be unintentionally shutting your child out. And if you're not there for your child, who will be?

Emotional and spiritual wellbeing are just as important as physical health. Even at a young age, you can help teach your child a simple technique that provides you with a means to hear the voice beyond the words. It's a little trick I learned from my Mom, and all you need is a piece of paper and a pencil.

I grew up in a large family. With five children, my Mom was concerned that she might miss a cue, a subtle hint that would indicate when one of us was in trouble or needed to talk, so she came up with a plan when we were very young.

Mom gathered us around the kitchen table and took out a piece of paper and a pencil and she proceed to explain her concept at the most basic level.

"Sometimes Mommy is busy, but I am never, ever too busy for my children. I promise that I will always make time for you, but I need you to let me know if you are having a problem."

Then she drew a picture and showed it to us. "If something is bothering you, draw a picture of a sad face and give it to me. Mommy will never ignore it. This is our secret code and I will be there to help you."

We were a demanding bunch, and I'm sure it wasn't easy for my Mom. Sometimes that note would arrive right in the middle of her making dinner, or while she was on the phone or when she finally sat down to watch TV. But she would always take that child with the sad-faced picture aside. Many times, she would have to coax the problem out of us by asking a series of questions, but we always felt better afterward.

As we got older, this little plan kept the doors of communication wide open. In those difficult, embarrassing moments of childhood, Mom was always true to her word. Whenever she received a note, everything would stop and the writer would receive her private and undivided attention.

Interesting though, were the far-reaching benefits of this little plan. You see, by giving us this additional means to be heard, we were taught that our concerns, problems and opinions were valid and important. We learned how to express our feelings and we knew the luxury of having someone there to listen. But we also became responsible individuals and learned valuable lessons in honesty and accountability. Our Mom showed us how to keep a promise. And as a family, we faced our problems together and head on.

Although the idea was simple, it was also powerful. This very wise, sensitive, nurturing woman empowered her young children with the right to be heard and the gift of confidence. Today I use this concept in my own family and in my work as well.

As advocates for children's rights, my husband and I speak about the consequences of bullying. The best defense against a bully is to tell an adult, but we are well aware that this is a difficult task for some children. Even when a child is otherwise vocal, discussing harassment at the hands of a peer can be painful, embarrassing, or scary.

We take great care to explain that unless a child makes their concerns known, adults can't help. We explain that sometimes adults don't pay attention, but this doesn't mean they don't care. We encourage children not to give up and tell them to reach out to an adult by writing a note or drawing a picture.

Someday, if a child hands you a note, we hope that even if you weren't raised with a secret family code for "please listen to me," you will stop what you are doing and focus on the voice of the child before you.

About The Author

Patricia Gatto and John De Angelis are the authors of MILTON'S DILEMMA, the tale of a lonely boy's magical journey to friendship and self-acceptance. As advocates for literacy and children's rights, the authors speak at schools and community events to foster awareness and provide children with a safe and healthy learning environment. For more information, please visit Joyful Productions at http://www.joyfulproductions.com

pgatto@ptd.net

Frumpy Mama

Writen by Sara Poginy

Somehow it has happened. I never wanted this to happen, and I swore up and down that it never would. I vowed to be the well-dressed, sophisticated mama, with matching accessories and interesting things to say. But it happened anyway. Despite my best efforts, I've become a frumpy mama.

Before I had my daughter, I wore interesting clothes - even a VARIETY of interesting clothes. They weren't necessarily expensive or even name brand, but they were put together in an interesting fashion. I even wore earrings (gasp!) and sometimes bracelets. I had a diverse selection of shoes and wore them all. I was equal-opportunity shoe wearer.

When I envisioned my life with a child, I saw myself as being that mother who looks like she has it together. You know the one - she's always behind you in line at Starbucks as you wrestle your purse, your child and manage to dump cream all over your clothes. She's got a designer handbag, is wearing those pointy-toed, high-heeled shoes, and her child is quietly standing there, holding her own designer handbag. Now it's not like I wanted to be quite so precocious - I don't need name brand - but I wanted to be "put-together." Well, let's be honest, I didn't even need that. Mostly, I just didn't want to be the one dumping half and half all over myself in public.

Immediately after I had the baby, I felt saggy and flabby and all the normal stuff. I went to Old Navy and purchased a new wardrobe that would cover the flab and still managed to somewhat meet my criteria of interesting. But after several months, I was a size or two smaller and the budget didn't permit excessive shopping. So I bought a couple pairs of jeans and several shirts that were semi-decent and settled on those.

Now here we are, 14 months after baby and I'm still a little flabbier than I had hoped to be, but this is life. But the problem is that I still only have a couple pairs of jeans and a few shirts that I actually feel comfortable in. (See how now it's about "comfort" and not so much about "fashion?") I've tried some of my clothes from "before baby," but the vast majority are either too short or too low-rise or too something-or-other. So every day, I am destined to put on any combination of the old tried and true. (Hmmm…brown shirt with jeans or black turtleneck with green khakis?)

Bottom line is that I'm getting tired of the same clothes; tired of feeling unstylish (is that a word?); tired of being the one dumping cream all over myself. But one good thing is that this has given me a better understanding of my mother and her wardrobe issues. And it's only clothes after all.

I am a mother who is committed to staying home with my child. I am also committed to finding ways to supplement our income from home; ideally I'd like to do this through writing, as this is my passion. I am often sarcastic, cynical and raw in my writing. I am always honest.