Friday, January 2, 2009

An Effective Discipline Method

Writen by Morgan Hamilton

When discussing how to discipline children, there are many theories. Discipline for children can be a difficult subject, and opinions vary across several lines of reasoning. Parents can find themselves frustrated from yelling, repeating themselves, and fighting with their children to get them to follow instructions or behave appropriately. In spite of all these differences, there are most definitely some effective techniques that can be deployed in terms of finding a discipline method that works. While no technique is the answer in itself, successful discipline can be achieved by combining several methods that work for your own family. One method of discipline is called 1-2-3 magic. It is an effective way to set boundaries, yet at the same time the child feels as though they have a say in what is going on. The method also works quite well for teachers in a classroom setting too.

This is how the discipline method works:

One direction or instructions are given to the child by the parent, and the child fails to follow the instructions, the parent simply tells the child, "That's one. Three will result in a time-out", or some other form of punitive action can be taken depending upon the seriousness of the offense. This in empowers the the child to take responsibility for his or herself by acting in a desirable manner or suffer the consequences.

If he still refuses to follow the instruction, the parent follows up by saying, "That's two." At this point it would probably be a good idea to once again repeat the previous directions. If the child stops the inappropriate behavior and follows the instruction, then the problem has been solved. If the child still refuses to follow instructions than the parents simply states "That's three," and follows with the consequence stated at the start of the counting.

Please note that this method should not be used in the case of a child hitting or otherwise hurting another person, or if the child says something totally inappropriate that needs to be stopped immediately. In those cases, a consequence needs to happen immediately, as if the child has gone straight to "three."

It is also important to point out that you must follow through on the consequence of the action otherwise this discipline method will be rendered ineffective. In other words, the kid will call your bluff.

This discipline method can most helpful for parents or adults who are tired of repeating themselves and yelling to get a child to follow directions. Simply counting can replace yelling.

The appropriate consequence should be dictated by the child's age. It can mean forfeiting their allowance, losing television privileges, extra chores, early bedtime, or grounding, to name a few. The more matter-of-fact and unemotional the parent can be when administering the consequence, and even when doing the counting itself, the more the discipline method can be effective.

Reacting emotionally to a child's behavior can signify weakness and dilute the message and thereby undermined the lesson. If the parent stays calm, the child loses that feeling of power over the parent's emotional state. There will be little or no attempts at manipulation.

Meeting on discipline can be a rather difficult and delicate function. This 1-2-3 method can be a tool for establishing authority in a way that preserves the adult's dignity and emotional state, and reduce frustration for all involved. I would suggest looking at your local bookstore or on the Internet for the book "1-2-3 Magic" for more information.

Morgan Hamilton offers his findings and insights regarding family. You can get interesting and informative information here at Discipline Method

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